Jeneen's Story

My name is Jeneen Haven, and my son Tyler Andrew was born on October 5, 1996. He was full term (5 days early) and was born with no complications. He latched on about 15 minutes after birth, and seemed to be doing just fine. That night, he slept for 6 hours, and the nurses told us to just let him sleep, he was just tired from being born. He continued this sleepy routine into the next day, even after we returned home. I became worried, and tried everything to keep him awake. He was stripped completely naked with ice packs on his back and still sleeping through the feedings. Concurrent to his sleeping, my nipples were becoming increasingly sore, so although I knew he needed to eat in order to thrive I dreaded waking him up because I knew how much pain it would cause me. By the second day, I was crying through every feeding, each of which lasted about 45 minutes, because he was going about 6 hours in between. Finally, on his third day home from the hospital, I insisted he be seen by a doctor, and when he was, my suspicions were confirmed. He was re-admitted to the hospital for dehydration. The doctor on duty advised that in order for us to ensure he was getting enough to eat, I needed to supplement 2 ounces of formula after each feeding, and this I vehemently opposed; I had no lack of milk--just an incredibly sleepy baby. While in the hospital, a lactation consultant observed a feeding and assured me that I was doing everything perfect and the soreness I felt was just normal. I called everyone I knew who had nursed and they assured me that after a week the soreness would be gone. After we returned home from our second hospital stay, Tyler was eating voraciously every 1 1/2 to two hours. I was still crying through every feeding and found myself feeling a lot of hostility towards him for the pain he was causing. He enjoyed sleeping with my nipple in his mouth, and no matter how deep of a sleep he was in, would cry uncontrollably if I unlatched him. I felt victimized and lied to, having been told that nursing didn't hurt, but continued to resist the advice of well meaning friends and family to "just give him a bottle". I knew that the nursing relationship is one that can last potentially for years, and I was not willing to give up a long term relationship because of a short term affliction. I went to see another lactation consultant who determined that Tyler had a bubble shaped palate and gave us some excercises to do with him. Per her instructions, I began pumping and finger feeding to give my nipples a rest, and she said the soreness should subside in a matter of days (by this time I was blistered and bleeding). In order to pump effectively, I was doing moist heat and massage for 15 minutes before every pumping (or feeding) and by the time the whole ordeal was completed and he was fed, I had about a half an hour break before it was time to start the process again. In addition to these daytime problems, Tyler was waking about every 40 minutes to nurse in the night as well. Numerous people encouraged me to give him a formula bottle at night, but I continued nursing exclusively. After another week, we went to see her again. She asked if I might have thrush, and could I ask my doctor to look at me. I was seen by a doctor who assured me that I did not, so I waited another week (still crying through every feeding). Finally, I went to see a midwife and begged for a prescription of Nystatin, regardless of what she thought, and she complied. I felt better in 24 hours, however because Tyler's doctor refused to prescribe oral Nystatin for him, I was re-infected, and the soreness returned. Finally, about 6 weeks after Tyler was born, his doctor agreed to give him the prescription, and the soreness went away. Our ordeal was not quite over yet, however, as the yeast left so long untreated in my body had developed into a systemic infection rather than topical, and I still suffered from an itchy feeling and deep intense pain inside my breasts. Finally, I was able to obtain a prescription for Diflucan tablets, which took care of that infection as well. Tyler continued to wake about 8-10 times each night until eight months of age, and I still have no idea why. All I can conclude is that he needed to connect with me frequently during the night. Having met those needs to the best of my ability for eight months, I am now rewarded with a baby who wakes only 3-5 times each night, and It is heavensent! Tyler is now 9 months old and thriving! He loves to nurse now more than ever. The other day we reached a milestone. If I ask him "Tyler would you like to nurse?" and he does, then he crawls over to me just as fast as he can and positions himself on my lap with his arm wrapped around my waist, ready to nurse. He still eats about every hour and a half, and I cherish those frequent opportunities to bond with my son and I appreciate them so much more intensely because of all off the pain and sacrifice I had to endure in order for this relationship to flourish. I have learned more about myself and my role as a woman and mother from this experience than any other I have ever passed through. I do not think that I ever would have realized my full capacity to love had it not been for the difficulties I experienced. I know that breastfeeding is the single most important thing any mother can do for herself and her baby and I look forward to years of nursing to come.

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